When Yeridah Happens to Good People

We can't believe its almost been a month since launch! Things have been very, very busy here at Diramates HQ. Our webmaster Karen has been working overtime on improving the site as we welcome more new members. So, first, welcome everyone! We hope you have been enjoying your experience so far on the site and - as always - we appreciate all feedback!

A couple of weeks ago, I got an e-mail from my friend Jesse. He made Aliyah with Nefesh B'Nefesh back in January 2010. He was so happy to be here! He was full of enthusiasm and excitement about his Aliyah. You talk to him and you just felt his love for Israel. Granted, he missed things about his life in the States, particularly his girlfriend and his family, but he was a Zionist, living out the Zionist dream, and he was going to stick it out here in Israel!

And then, slowly, that excitement faded away to frustrations. Seemingly, at every turn, he faced more and more challenges. First, he was placed in a class at his Ulpan that wasn't appropriate for him. While he probably was placed correctly, given his Hebrew skills, he felt that he was above the class. He tried to get his placement changed to a higher level class but the school refused to move him and so, daily, he felt frustrated with his Ulpan.

When it came time for employment, he energetically went on many interviews. His dream job - to work in communications for the State of Israel - was not within his reach. And so, as he saw his money dwindling with no employment available to him other than waitering at a restaurant in Tel Aviv, he became very anxious. Life isn't cheap in Israel and - just the basics such as rent, bills, health insurance payments, food, transportation, etc - adds up. He started worrying about how he was going to make his next cell phone bill payment, or where he was going to find the money to pay for his rent and utilities. Quickly, his Sal Klita fund was getting dangerously low, and he became really anxious about making ends meet.

If that wasn't enough of a stresser - Jesse ended up finding roommates in Tel Aviv who were not compatible. While looking for a place to live he answered an ad he found online, met with two native Israeli's living in a three room apartment, and after an hour conversation, decided to move in. It just didn't click. There were personality issues, lifestyle issues and cultural issues that he just couldn't overcome.

And so, frustrated with his financial situation and his living situation, Jesse decided it was time to move back to the States. Four months after his Aliyah, Jesse made Yeridah, and is now picking up the pieces of his life back in America.

I was very sad to hear that he moved back to the States, and I know how much he is missing Israel. We miss him too and were really upset that his Aliyah experience didn't turn out the way he had dreamed it would.

Jesse's story is the reason why we work so hard on Diramates. Aliyah is very difficult, it's important that everyone who is getting ready to make the move, to realize that things will be challenging when you get to the Holy Land. But, with the right support network, anyone can make it here! And, at the very least, we hope to help take the weight off of your shoulders when it comes to your living arrangements.

Our goal is to help you find the most compatible roommates for you, so that you have that support system when you go home at night. When a day of pounding the pavements searching for a job yields nothing but sweat stains and disappointments, that your home here in Israel is a haven. That the people you choose to live with will help pick you up when you're feeling down. That you're not surprised when your landlord asks for the Arnona payment, or ups the Vaad Bayit because the winter month's have arrived.

We hope you'll turn to us with your frustrations and your finds - let us know how we can help you! If you're having a bad day, e-mail us! We're here to help you! And, if you're having a wonderful experience - either with the apartment or roommate you found through Diramates - make sure you also let us know!

Have you made Aliyah already? If so, how are you finding the experience? Are you planning on making Aliyah? What are your concerns!

Post a message and let us know!

Twas the Night Before Launch

Twas the night before launch and all through the Dira, one CEO and a very talented webmaster were frantically getting all last minute action items crossed off the list.

This is it. We're finally here. The day I've been waiting for since August 2006, when I came up with the idea of Diramates. Its taken four years of website development, research, coming up with appropriate funds, marketing and PR plans and logo creation to get to this point.

First, I'd like to thank Karen - my extremely talented and amazing webmaster. She rescued the website when I thought it was doomed to fail. And, in less than a year, turned it around to be this great platform to help hundreds of thousands of single Olim find the perfect roommate when they make Aliyah to Israel.

Next, I must thank my business partner, who shall remain nameless. For his years of support, both financially and emotionally, and for giving me the creative license to basically do whatever the heck I wanted to do with this site.

Finally, to my loving family, who has supported me and Diramates since the site was in its infancy. To my husband, who spent hours working with Karen, testing links, filling out profiles, e-mailing suggestions on how to improve the site, and putting his own blood, sweat and tears into this project to help it succeed.

I'm so excited about tomorrow, I have that nervous rumbling in my belly. I doubt I'll sleep much tonight.

It's like Black Thursday at Walmart, and I'm envisioning people lining up at the door for that 4:00 a.m. opening. No stampeding please, folks, there's more than enough for everyone. Obviously, I'm not selling a Playstation and people aren't buying Christmas presents, but that's the excitement I feel about tomorrow morning!

So folks, here are my wishes and hopes for your experience as a member of Diramates:

1) That you should meet the perfect roommate for you. Making Aliyah is hard, and there are a lot of difficult situations which lie ahead. Everyone deals with it, it's an inevitable part of the experience. But what I wish for all you dear members, is that finding a roommate isn't one of them. May you join the site, and meet the perfect person to live with when you first make Aliyah. Someone you connect with, someone who can be the support you will need to make it through acclimating through life in Israel. It will just make such a difference.

2) May you find the perfect apartment for you - and your new roommate - in Israel. There are very few English language apartment search resources in this Country. Again, it's difficult enough as it is to move here, it shouldn't be so difficult to find an apartment too. My wish for you, deal members, is to be able to browse through a plethora of appropriate apartments listings in English. So you don't have to do what I did, break my teeth on Hebrew language sites and cry in frustration when I kept mixing up the word for furnished and airconditioning.

3) May the information on our site help you navigate through the apartment rental situation. When I moved to this Country, I had no idea what a Vaad Bayit or Arnona was. I also was shocked when my crook of a landlord (that story later) insisted I hand her a year's worth of pre-dated checks at contract signing. Oh, and the contract was in Hebrew and I mention my Hebrew language skills are on par with a 7th grade Yeshiva student? Fortunately, I was able to find a couple of friends to vouch for me, but had I been prepared before I moved to the Country, the shock wouldn't have been so difficult to absorb.

So dear members - and future members - I'm off to finish tweaks on our launch press release, plan the first newsletter, check to make sure links are working, work with Karen on last minute aesthetics of the site, and then I'm turning in for the night.

I hope you'll comment and let me know what you think about our site! And, we are always interested in hearing your suggestions on how we can make your experience as a Diramates member, much better.

Thank you, and Good Night!

Seller Snafus

As you know, we've been searching for an apartment to buy in Jerusalem. Our search has taken us to all over the place - we've seen run down places in Katamon and gorgeous, newly renovated apartments in Baka. We haven't found the place for us yet, but today's apartment viewing takes the cake!

We looked at a 2 bedroom apartment in a gorgeous building on Rachel Imanu, located right next door to the Christian Embassy. While we were looking around, the owners were meeting with a real estate agent. She asked the owners about their price, which they have set at a whopping 1.9 million shekel.

The owners, IN FRONT OF US, say that they know the price is outlandish but they have it high in order to cover costs of expenses.

Now, that's just not smart. We walked out of there with a bad taste in our mouths and while, we firmly believe the sale price is up to the discretion of the owners, do me a favor and don't let the buyers know.

We keep looking!

Launch in 23 days!!

Shiputzim

We met Eli Rechintal at yesterday's open house and he does shiputzim/renovations. He sent us photos of his work. If you want to speak with him about renovations, feel free to contact him at 0508-750333

Tweet Me!

Now you can follow our tweet here as well as @diramates

Send us a tweet now and let us know how you like the site!

Living with Sam

This is my Zaydie Sam Steinberg (A"H) at his 92nd birthday party at Noah's Ark on the Lower East Side. He was one of the sweetest men I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. He was a very kind Grandfather too, and he always had a big smile on his face whenever he was near his family.

He was also the best roommate I ever had, and one of the inspirations behind my creation of Diramates.  

So there I was, 22 years old and a Junior Account Executive at one of the most prestigious public relations firms in the Country. I was living in the Westmont on Manhattan's Upper West Side in a room the size of a closet (in reality, it was supposed to be the apartment's pantry) and paying $770 a month for that "honor". On my meager salary (it WAS 1999), I was burning through my Bat Mitzvah savings on things like food and clothing. In truth, I was not happy with my living situation and I needed to find a solution - and fast. Moving back home to live with my parents was not an option, I wanted to be young and single and living in the City! I didn't want to have more than a 15 minute commute from office to apartment, and I certainly didn't want be on my parents time clock when I wanted to spend the evening partying with friends.

My Aunt suggested that I move in with my 88 year old Granfather, who had a two bedroom apartment on Grand and Lewis on the Lower East Side. I wouldn't have to pay rent and it was still 15 minutes from office to apartment on the F train. I was very hesitant. The neighborhood was scary as it was only starting to become trendy in the late 90's, and religiously it was a dying community for Orthodox Jewish singles. Aside from the neighborhood situation, I was afraid I would become my Zaydie's "nursemaid". It was a very selfish attitude, but at 22 I wasn't too mature. I didn't want to end up having to make sure he took his medication, cook him meals or do his laundry just because we lived together. At this stage of my life, my world revolved around my job, the friends I had at my job, and the celebrity studded events I went to. I also had a side job working with the New York Rangers, which meant that on game nights I didn't get home until Midnight. When I wasn't working, I wanted to go out and just have fun. I certainly didn't need to be saddled by an octogenarian roommate.

But, with basically no money in my bank to support my new lifestyle, I had no choice. I bit the bullet and moved downtown during a Manhattan Monsoon in August. It was one of the best decisions of my entire life.

Zaydie was the coolest roommate ever. I was shocked at our compatibility. He didn't expect me to do anything, ever. And because he never expected anything, I was willing to do much more. In the mornings, when he got back from morning services, he would gently rap on my door (read: bang loudly) to make sure I was awake. He always offered me a bite to eat (the man only cooked eggs, but he cooked it well) when I raced out the door, and recommended I wear a sweater or take a jacket if the weather was too cold. When we lived together, I was never late for work (except for the weeks when he was in the hospital with pneumonia) and I always dressed appropriately. 

We liked the same shows, and he would join me in the living room to catch the afternoon football game. When I watched MTV, he would snooze in the chair next to me and wake up during commercials to comment on the program he wasn't really watching.

He was hard of hearing, so my music or TV volume was never an issue for him. He also didn't mind my taste of music, which during the late 90's was dominated by Oasis, Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana and Fiona Apple.

I hated to clean the apartment and Zaydie always cleaned before Shabbos. He would make sure to wash the floor in my room too, and he never once complained that I never pitched in to clean the toilet. And every two weeks, on Sunday afternoons, we would go down into the bowels of 550 G, H and I Grand Streets and do our laundry together. We sat in the chairs and watched our clothes go round and round in the dryer, catching up on our previous work weeks and world events, and then we folded our stuff together and piled them into his Bubby cart (which he insisted on pushing). 

There were many Saturday nights when I wouldn't get back home until the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes, I walked in and he was already awake in the kitchen, sipping a cup of tea and getting ready to go open the shul. If I wasn't too tired, I would join him for a few minutes and tell him about my evening. He never once chastized me for coming home too late, never once asked me to report in on where I was going or when I was going to be back. He respected me, and that led to a 2 1/2 year mutually respectable living arrangement.

In truth, it was really nice living with a man, regardless that he was 88 and my Grandfather. It was nice to have someone to light the Chanukah candles with, to say Havdalah for me, and to trap and kill the mouse that terrorized me over Purim. The best part was the companionship, which he provided when I wanted it. When I wanted some alone time, he always understood and never got offended when I went into my room and closed the door. He also never once commented on my phone conversation, even though eavesdropping was inevitable since the walls were pretty thin.

Moving out of the apartment and into my own place was one of the hardest decisions I ever made. And, not because of the steep rent that I ended up paying, but because we had grown so close to each other that I really missed living with him. When I moved into his apartment, I honestly didn't think our living situation would last. I never could have known that an 88 year old and a 22 year old would make compatible roommates. 

Diramates was born out of a difficult life experience. Namely, when I moved from Manhattan to Tel Aviv in the summer of 2006.  I had no family in this Country and very few friends. I ended up making many mistakes, particularly when it came to living arrangements. I'll elaborate further in a later post. 

My vision for Diramates is that for everyone who makes Aliyah or comes to Israel, alone, for an extended period of time - and is looking for a wonderful living situation - that they should find compatible roommates much like myself and my Zaydie were. 

It's hard enough to move someplace alone, especially when the language, people and culture and different and take getting used to. Wouldn't it be a better experience if your home life - your sanctuary - is a good one? And, for those who want to live with roommates, compatibility is absolutely essential and in some cases, the key to a wonderful life experience.

So, welcome to my blog and to Diramates. Check back often as we'll be writing about our own experiences living in Israel, providing advice on how to handle just about any living situation, and weighing in on roommate etiquette. 

We look forward to hearing from you too!