Twas the Night Before Launch

Twas the night before launch and all through the Dira, one CEO and a very talented webmaster were frantically getting all last minute action items crossed off the list.

This is it. We're finally here. The day I've been waiting for since August 2006, when I came up with the idea of Diramates. Its taken four years of website development, research, coming up with appropriate funds, marketing and PR plans and logo creation to get to this point.

First, I'd like to thank Karen - my extremely talented and amazing webmaster. She rescued the website when I thought it was doomed to fail. And, in less than a year, turned it around to be this great platform to help hundreds of thousands of single Olim find the perfect roommate when they make Aliyah to Israel.

Next, I must thank my business partner, who shall remain nameless. For his years of support, both financially and emotionally, and for giving me the creative license to basically do whatever the heck I wanted to do with this site.

Finally, to my loving family, who has supported me and Diramates since the site was in its infancy. To my husband, who spent hours working with Karen, testing links, filling out profiles, e-mailing suggestions on how to improve the site, and putting his own blood, sweat and tears into this project to help it succeed.

I'm so excited about tomorrow, I have that nervous rumbling in my belly. I doubt I'll sleep much tonight.

It's like Black Thursday at Walmart, and I'm envisioning people lining up at the door for that 4:00 a.m. opening. No stampeding please, folks, there's more than enough for everyone. Obviously, I'm not selling a Playstation and people aren't buying Christmas presents, but that's the excitement I feel about tomorrow morning!

So folks, here are my wishes and hopes for your experience as a member of Diramates:

1) That you should meet the perfect roommate for you. Making Aliyah is hard, and there are a lot of difficult situations which lie ahead. Everyone deals with it, it's an inevitable part of the experience. But what I wish for all you dear members, is that finding a roommate isn't one of them. May you join the site, and meet the perfect person to live with when you first make Aliyah. Someone you connect with, someone who can be the support you will need to make it through acclimating through life in Israel. It will just make such a difference.

2) May you find the perfect apartment for you - and your new roommate - in Israel. There are very few English language apartment search resources in this Country. Again, it's difficult enough as it is to move here, it shouldn't be so difficult to find an apartment too. My wish for you, deal members, is to be able to browse through a plethora of appropriate apartments listings in English. So you don't have to do what I did, break my teeth on Hebrew language sites and cry in frustration when I kept mixing up the word for furnished and airconditioning.

3) May the information on our site help you navigate through the apartment rental situation. When I moved to this Country, I had no idea what a Vaad Bayit or Arnona was. I also was shocked when my crook of a landlord (that story later) insisted I hand her a year's worth of pre-dated checks at contract signing. Oh, and the contract was in Hebrew and I mention my Hebrew language skills are on par with a 7th grade Yeshiva student? Fortunately, I was able to find a couple of friends to vouch for me, but had I been prepared before I moved to the Country, the shock wouldn't have been so difficult to absorb.

So dear members - and future members - I'm off to finish tweaks on our launch press release, plan the first newsletter, check to make sure links are working, work with Karen on last minute aesthetics of the site, and then I'm turning in for the night.

I hope you'll comment and let me know what you think about our site! And, we are always interested in hearing your suggestions on how we can make your experience as a Diramates member, much better.

Thank you, and Good Night!

Living with Sam

This is my Zaydie Sam Steinberg (A"H) at his 92nd birthday party at Noah's Ark on the Lower East Side. He was one of the sweetest men I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. He was a very kind Grandfather too, and he always had a big smile on his face whenever he was near his family.

He was also the best roommate I ever had, and one of the inspirations behind my creation of Diramates.  

So there I was, 22 years old and a Junior Account Executive at one of the most prestigious public relations firms in the Country. I was living in the Westmont on Manhattan's Upper West Side in a room the size of a closet (in reality, it was supposed to be the apartment's pantry) and paying $770 a month for that "honor". On my meager salary (it WAS 1999), I was burning through my Bat Mitzvah savings on things like food and clothing. In truth, I was not happy with my living situation and I needed to find a solution - and fast. Moving back home to live with my parents was not an option, I wanted to be young and single and living in the City! I didn't want to have more than a 15 minute commute from office to apartment, and I certainly didn't want be on my parents time clock when I wanted to spend the evening partying with friends.

My Aunt suggested that I move in with my 88 year old Granfather, who had a two bedroom apartment on Grand and Lewis on the Lower East Side. I wouldn't have to pay rent and it was still 15 minutes from office to apartment on the F train. I was very hesitant. The neighborhood was scary as it was only starting to become trendy in the late 90's, and religiously it was a dying community for Orthodox Jewish singles. Aside from the neighborhood situation, I was afraid I would become my Zaydie's "nursemaid". It was a very selfish attitude, but at 22 I wasn't too mature. I didn't want to end up having to make sure he took his medication, cook him meals or do his laundry just because we lived together. At this stage of my life, my world revolved around my job, the friends I had at my job, and the celebrity studded events I went to. I also had a side job working with the New York Rangers, which meant that on game nights I didn't get home until Midnight. When I wasn't working, I wanted to go out and just have fun. I certainly didn't need to be saddled by an octogenarian roommate.

But, with basically no money in my bank to support my new lifestyle, I had no choice. I bit the bullet and moved downtown during a Manhattan Monsoon in August. It was one of the best decisions of my entire life.

Zaydie was the coolest roommate ever. I was shocked at our compatibility. He didn't expect me to do anything, ever. And because he never expected anything, I was willing to do much more. In the mornings, when he got back from morning services, he would gently rap on my door (read: bang loudly) to make sure I was awake. He always offered me a bite to eat (the man only cooked eggs, but he cooked it well) when I raced out the door, and recommended I wear a sweater or take a jacket if the weather was too cold. When we lived together, I was never late for work (except for the weeks when he was in the hospital with pneumonia) and I always dressed appropriately. 

We liked the same shows, and he would join me in the living room to catch the afternoon football game. When I watched MTV, he would snooze in the chair next to me and wake up during commercials to comment on the program he wasn't really watching.

He was hard of hearing, so my music or TV volume was never an issue for him. He also didn't mind my taste of music, which during the late 90's was dominated by Oasis, Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana and Fiona Apple.

I hated to clean the apartment and Zaydie always cleaned before Shabbos. He would make sure to wash the floor in my room too, and he never once complained that I never pitched in to clean the toilet. And every two weeks, on Sunday afternoons, we would go down into the bowels of 550 G, H and I Grand Streets and do our laundry together. We sat in the chairs and watched our clothes go round and round in the dryer, catching up on our previous work weeks and world events, and then we folded our stuff together and piled them into his Bubby cart (which he insisted on pushing). 

There were many Saturday nights when I wouldn't get back home until the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes, I walked in and he was already awake in the kitchen, sipping a cup of tea and getting ready to go open the shul. If I wasn't too tired, I would join him for a few minutes and tell him about my evening. He never once chastized me for coming home too late, never once asked me to report in on where I was going or when I was going to be back. He respected me, and that led to a 2 1/2 year mutually respectable living arrangement.

In truth, it was really nice living with a man, regardless that he was 88 and my Grandfather. It was nice to have someone to light the Chanukah candles with, to say Havdalah for me, and to trap and kill the mouse that terrorized me over Purim. The best part was the companionship, which he provided when I wanted it. When I wanted some alone time, he always understood and never got offended when I went into my room and closed the door. He also never once commented on my phone conversation, even though eavesdropping was inevitable since the walls were pretty thin.

Moving out of the apartment and into my own place was one of the hardest decisions I ever made. And, not because of the steep rent that I ended up paying, but because we had grown so close to each other that I really missed living with him. When I moved into his apartment, I honestly didn't think our living situation would last. I never could have known that an 88 year old and a 22 year old would make compatible roommates. 

Diramates was born out of a difficult life experience. Namely, when I moved from Manhattan to Tel Aviv in the summer of 2006.  I had no family in this Country and very few friends. I ended up making many mistakes, particularly when it came to living arrangements. I'll elaborate further in a later post. 

My vision for Diramates is that for everyone who makes Aliyah or comes to Israel, alone, for an extended period of time - and is looking for a wonderful living situation - that they should find compatible roommates much like myself and my Zaydie were. 

It's hard enough to move someplace alone, especially when the language, people and culture and different and take getting used to. Wouldn't it be a better experience if your home life - your sanctuary - is a good one? And, for those who want to live with roommates, compatibility is absolutely essential and in some cases, the key to a wonderful life experience.

So, welcome to my blog and to Diramates. Check back often as we'll be writing about our own experiences living in Israel, providing advice on how to handle just about any living situation, and weighing in on roommate etiquette. 

We look forward to hearing from you too!